Shadowed feelings

I know I've made some pretty crappy decisions. Just look at it from my perspective for a sec. From the moment I was created, I was totally clueless. Ganon told me a believable enough lie, so I clung to it. I worked for him. I released Vaati, kidnapped Zelda, tried to kill the Four Sword hero, the whole shebang. Only because I thought that was what I was supposed to do. Everyone wants a purpose. That was the only one I know.

Convinced of my innocence yet? Good, because I'm not.

Just between you, me, and that tree over there, for majority of my life, I had a crush on Zelda. Yeah, I know. I'm a cold, heartless shadow. I just assume, like I did back then, it was because I was Link's Shadow.

Whenever I had some free time, I popped up and visited her. I could tell she hated it, but it didn't matter to me. I enjoyed being near her. We mostly argued and exchanged barbs, but the words never hurt either of us. I enjoyed every second of it. That is, until the time she slapped me. I can't remember much of that conversation now. I just started bragging about how Vaati would win in the end and take over Hyrule. Next thing I knew, there was a sharp stinging sensation in my face. It took me a few moments to realize what had happened. She said something about me being horrible, and I felt my blood boil. There it was again, being compared to Link. It was obvious she liked him, and whenever he was mentioned by her, I felt jealousy roll over me in waves. He had a perfect life. Me? Not so much. So I ended up retaliating with saying once everything was said and done, he would be gone and she would be alone. Then she'd like me. I looked like him enough. I could even perfectly mimic him if I wanted to.

Of course, that was also the night that Vio, who I thought was my best friend, betrayed me and tried to break the dark mirror. It was just not my day.

I was enraged. Not just by Vio, but by Zelda. By Vaati. By Ganon. Link. Everyone. So I let my anger control my decisions and yelled out the words "Execute this traitor!" before I even thought on them.

And that day just kept getting worse and worse. Not only did the other Links come in to save Vio at the last second, but they all killed me. I just stared at Vio while the fire temple crumbled, cold hatred in my eyes. I lunged, but the heroes all attacked me with force energy at once.

Light.

That was the one thing I hated most. The one thing I feared. It was bad enough I had to deal with it in this stupid world, but being attacked with four blasts of it at once...it was my worst nightmare come true. The pain consumed my entire body, and I swear, I still felt pain after I was dead and once again banished to live in the dark world.

I didn't know what I did wrong. It felt like punishment being shoved back into the world of light again. The memory of pain sent it shooting right back into me, maybe not as bad, but it still left me weak.

Then I sensed her next to me. Zelda. Her gaze was the worst thing I had experienced up to that point. Filled with pity, sadness. I didn't want her sympathy! She broke my heart, she didn't care!

"Do you really think the light will hurt you? Don't you see? You are a Link, too. Deep inside, you're really a hero."

Those words flipped my world upside-down. Suddenly, a whole new possibility opened up for me. I didn't have to follow Ganon. If I couldn't get her to feel the same way I did...the least I could do was make up for everything I'd done to her. I felt my left hand twinge, and courage surged through me. I was prepared to do anything, everything, pay the ultimate price. I could be a hero.

I kept that thought in mind as I shattered the dark mirror. Pain unlike any I'd ever felt surged through me, but I barely took notice. I could only think about how good it felt to turn on Vaati and save the day. I died a little bit after, but it was definitely worth it.
The last thought that entered my mind was of Zelda. I hoped she wouldn't hate me anymore after Link told her what happened.

Nah, she wouldn't. She was smart. The bearer of the triforce of wisdom to boot. I was sure she'd know what happened and forgive me.

With that thought echoing in my head, I died with a smile on my face.


When I finished talking, my head was down, my eyes fixed on the floor in front of me. I leaned against the wall, my arms crossed, fidgeting nervously. I could feel heat in my face, which meant I had to be blushing, and I tilted my head lower, praying that my hair would cover most traces of the red.

"I should probably just go now." I turned around and made for the door, but a hand on my shoulder stopped me. I closed my eyes, held my breath, and clenched my teeth. Now I felt like a caged animal, and I needed out.

"Shadow," A voice said gently. Her voice. I used to love the sound of it, but now it just scared me. I believed she would forgive me while I died, but now, alive again, the thought seemed impossible. I was terrified of her judgment. I had avoided her for an entire week before finally gathering the courage to talk to her. And now all I wanted to do was run. "Wait."

I might as well have had a shock collar on me set to kill with her holding the remote.

"What? There's nothing else to say." I told her. It sounded forced, and I knew it.

"Yes, there is. Turn around."

I obeyed, although hesitantly. I avoided her gaze, opting to just stare at the ground again.

"Why do you think I hate you?"

I winced. She hit the nail on the head. Why did she have to have the triforce of wisdom?

"Didn't I already list off everything?" I pointed out, still not meeting her gaze.

"You've more than made up for your actions, Shadow." She told me gently. I didn't respond. My eyes were closed tightly, and I was struggling to keep my breathing even. Of course, she read my mind. "It isn't just that, is it?"

"It doesn't matter. I've dealt with this before; I'll just get over it again." I said, taking a step back towards the door, but when I looked at her expression, it stopped me dead in my tracks.

"Is this because of..." She trailed off. I wanted to turn my head, stare at something else, anything other than her perfect face, her deep blue eyes, but I just couldn't.
I suddenly felt like we were back at the Tower of Winds, with me lying helpless on the ground, her gaze burning into me, hurting in a way I couldn't describe.

I didn't want her to pity me. I just wanted her to like me.

I gave a small nod, confirming the unfinished question. The look she gave me softened even more than I thought was possible.

"I'm sorry, Shadow." She said. "It's just-"

"It's fine." I cut her off. It was a lie. I didn't feel fine. I felt a huge gaping hole in my chest that hurt more and more with every heartbeat.

Don't let this get you down! A voice in the back of my mind yelled. C'mon! Where's the old Shadow? Just because you're a hero doesn't mean you have to be all weak and sappy! There are hundreds of girls in the world, anyways. Get over her and find one that feels the same way about you!

I felt my signature smirk coming back. And hey, you're SHADOW! Why not go out with style?

I once again agreed with the voice in my head and felt my smirk just grow. I could tell by the look on her face she knew something was going on, but before she could say anything, I gave her a small kiss. It only lasted a second, but when I pulled back, there was a look of pure shock on her face, which just caused me to laugh.

"Sorry, I just had to." I told her, grinning. "See ya later, Princess!" And with that, I dissolved into the shadows.